Play by your own rules

 The Stop People Pleasing Reset

Learn to navigate a world that was not designed for how your mind works. 

Honour your true nature without the struggle

The group coaching offer as mentioned on the Stop people Pleasing podcast is now no longer available

Is This You?

You feel like people take advantage of you 

You always put other people's needs before your own - but they constantly undervalue you

People tell you to stop being so emotional - but use you as their emotional baggage handler

You keep sabotaging your own happiness, yet you have no idea why

You absorb others' emotions like a sponge - and you hate it 

Life is often exhausting, but you are clueless as how to change

You often comfort eat to deal with the overwhelm

Welcome to the Stop People Pleasing Reset.
By the end, you will:

Live Life On YOUR Terms

Instead of automatically putting others' needs before your own, you will have a toolkit for standing up for yourself - conflict-free. The personal freedom you long for is not dependent on anyone else's say-so. You will learn why you've denied yourself this freedom  - and how to grant it to yourself.

Set Boundaries

We take the charge out of  your fear of boundary setting by breaking the toxic invisible contracts you had with energy vampires and well-meaning time wasters. You develop a way to set boundaries that feels emotionally safe. You know you were never weak, and you accept yourself.

Own Who You Are

Welcome to the programme where you feel better about yourself from day one - not when you have achieved success. You will learn to honour your true nature. In this Reset, we graduate beyond the very idea of personal development (because you are fine as you are). We start focusing on what sort of life YOU want to create, free at last from self-censorship and fear of others' opinions.

"After working with Harriet, I can now make decisions for myself that give me what I need and fulfil my needs, and I don’t have to worry so much about upsetting or not pleasing other people."

Caito Stewart

caitostewart.com

So...How  Will  This  Programme  Impact  You?

Before you start The Reset :

You are ruled by your limiting beliefs

You spend time trying to fit in, but feeling like an outsider and resent people for not accepting you
You long to set better boundaries, but feel absolutely unable to do this. You see yourself as a weak person.


You wish you weren't so damn emotional - you see yourself as one hot mess of feelings - and you eat to cope with that



You wish you were stronger


 
You manage your relationship with the world through people pleasing, which leaves you frequently overwhelmed. You blame yourself.

After you've completed your Reset :

You have replaced limiting beliefs  with a focus on the future and the life you are creating
You honour who you are and have developed a strong internal sense of self 
You learn the Reset principle of Everybody's Free and liberate both yourself and others from unhelpful silent agreements. You see how much a change in behaviour changes your sense of self-acceptance. 
You understand that all emotions are messengers, and have learnt to manage them without eating them. You start feeling sorry for people with a repressed, stiff upper lip way of living (if you can call it living). You are on your way to putting food out of the job of life manager
Because you allow yourself to experience life directly, you accept yourself and embrace the 90% beats perfection principle. You become an awesome role model for younger people in your life.
Having broken the unhelpful invisible contracts you had with others, life gets easier AND the field of possibility opens up for you.

What's Inside The Stop People Pleasing Reset Programme?

Six self study video modules to watch at your own pace

Module 1

Shed Your Limiting Beliefs - No, Really...

Go beyond the platitudes of the super confident who peddle wishful thinking. Leave playing small behind for good.

Understand the root of limiting beliefs AND how to make them irrelevant
Rethinking relationships in an empowering way 
Stop trying to fit in and wishing the world would understand you and start forging your path to a life you love 

Module 2

Honour Your Neurodivergence

Neurodivergence means having a brain that works differently from most people. It is a helpful concept for people with autism and ADHD - so why not you?

Neutralise and make your peace with your inner victim - then put them out of a job 
A seven step process for honouring your neurodivergence
How to show up accepting who you are and silence detractors without conflict - even if you are full of self-doubt

Module 3

Boundary Setting 

Boundary setting through the lens of understanding the higher/lower self of others. An eye-opening reframe of an important issue.

Turn down the dial on your fear of standing up for yourself through the higher/lower self translator
How to strengthen your boundaries in a way that feels emotionally safe
 Subtle strategies to ward off energy vampires in a classy, no-conflict way

A Freedom I Did Not Know Existed

I have been able to create a personal freedom I did not know existed. Thank you Harriet for helping me to create a life where I feel that I am in control and can still be who I am as an empath.

Trista Ainsworth

tempteationstreatbox.com

Module 4

Neutralise Self-Sabotage 

You want to be more confident. You want to live on your own terms and stop apologising for your very existence , so why do you keep people pleasing? This module explains why, and gives you a practical way out. 

Learn what job your self-sabotage is attempting to do 
Reconnect with the two superpowers that will make self-sabotage redundant 
How to use your brain's feelgood neurochemicals to actually make this process FUN!


Module 5

Imposter Syndrome No More

Understand what is really happening when you experience imposter syndrome. Discover a powerful set of tools to make this very restrictive idea a non-issue for you.

Get neutral: discover why imposter syndrome is about a mismatch between our evolution and our 21st century world 
Find out what the London Blitz has to teach us about imposter syndrome
How managing your inner cavewoman is a gamechanger in making this process much easier

Module 6

Managing Overwhelm 

Learn why you spiral into overwhelm - it's not because you are weak. Learn the liberating truth about overwhelm, and what to do about it.  Welcome back to your life!

Learn about the invisible contracts you have with others that can trigger overwhelm 
What being D.I.M.M. is, why it trips so many people up - and how to dodge it 
A whole host of strategies to manage your interactions with people and sources of potential overstimulation.

Bonuses 

the RESET diaries

5 audios in which Harriet tells her own reset stories - real life uturns from people pleasing. They may not be perfect, but the learnings are powerful. Personal, messy and ultimately uplifting

the adventurer's
toolkit

A brand new way to see challenges that may have got you down in the past. Flip the switch from victim to adventurer using the movie Back To The Future

momentum

Once you've reset your tendencies from people pleasing to putting yourself first, The Mapping Process will help you plan out a focused path forward. No more wasting your precious life force on other people's goals!

"After talking over a difficult incident with Harriet, I was able to use my words and say “It hurt me” - and the person concerned apologised for that, and said how valuable I am to this process, to this organisation."

Larissa Malcolm flourishingfocus.com

Why do I think I can help you?


Instead of the usual "I am perfect and if you aspire to be me, that perfection is assured" bio you usually find, I thought it would be more useful to give you my warts-and-all mini bio.

Early 80s to 2020 - Harriet spends 4 decades of her life from the onset of adolescence to the age of 49 as a dyed-in-the-wool people pleaser. The perfect storm of being an empath and a deeply buried belief of I am not enough wreaks havoc in her life. Becomes a teacher and experiences sensory overload on a daily basis. Puts others first in relationships. In 2013, changes career to coach people with binge eating and sugar addiction. Recognises she is an empath and highly sensitive person, but sees these traits as mostly deadweights.

2020 Everything falls apart as she tries to meets everyone else's needs in COVID lockdown. This blessing in disguise makes her life so intolerable that she starts a massive internal rebellion against her inner critic, the constant self-censorship and deep resentment against energy vampires and time wasters. The path to freedom appears as she starts standing up to people...including her lower self! 

2021 Starts the Stop People Pleasing podcast as a way to process these changes. Begins the liberating process of seeing herself as neurodivergent and honouring her true nature.

FAQ

Our most asked questions

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