Date #8

Plan Your Big Date

Today you are going to plan date #30, because that day is going to be a celebration of this whole Body Confidence Project.

I’ve called it ‘the big date’ but don’t be hemmed in by that label.

You may not have a guy or gal to romance you; perhaps you are just disentangling yourself from a relationship.

You may be unable to go out in the evening - or for that matter the day.

Your funds may be low.

If so, then we are going to think outside the box.

Make Your Big Date Whatever You Want It To Be

Your big date is anything you want it to be, as long as you make it special. Do something that feels like a treat. It is all about you having a good time, with your favourite person/people if possible, and reflecting on the progress you have made with body acceptance. I want you to look in the mirror and say “Bloody hell, I DO look great!

Part of this month is about getting Cavebrain to relax and one of the things that happens when Cavebrain relaxes is you can allow yourself pleasure.

If you can celebrate with other women doing the BCP, all the better.

I want you to think about it now, 3 weeks ahead, so that you can arrange what you are going to do.

Date night does not have to be on day #30. All that matters is you plan something to look forward to around day #30.

You don’t have to dress to impress for this date, but why not? Again, it is all about making things a bit special. If you don’t usually wear heels, then get them out. Don’t usually wear a dress? Plan to wear one. Perhaps hunt around for something new to wear. One of the later dates in a week or so will be a clothes expedition, so keep that in mind.

Ideas For Your Big Date

Remember the rule of thumb: treat yourself.

If you are stuck for ideas, or if you feel isolated and cannot think of anyone you could ask to celebrate your date night with, here are some suggestions:

A spa day

An event with your local meetup group. You make the rules so even a morning coffee could be your date night! Have a look at to see what is happening near you. I suggest you try a couple of events before date night, because I know from experience that turning up at your first meetup can be nerve wracking.

A massage

Invite a few friends round for a meal or games night. A really good quiz I found that has some fun and thought-provoking questions is Shot In The Dark (it’s even teenage sarcasm proof! Meaning it is one of the few ideas I have that my 14 year-old does not find boring/ancient/saddo etc): Have a look at it here.

A day retreat eg yoga, buddhism

A girl’s night out

A cocktail making class

A takeaway and your favourite movie

An evening planning next year’s holiday

Video calling a friend - or friends - who lives a long way away you don’t usually chat to regularly

A session with a personal trainer

What To Do On This Date (i.e. today)

Make sure you pick one activity and take at least one step to arranging it today.

I am planning to try and crowbar two or three things into my date night and make it a whole day and evening!

Let me know by hitting reply to the email with this link in (or in a check in) what you have chosen for your date, and I will write it below.


Have you been doing the following regularly?...

Looking at role models (date #1)

Doing She Looks Great (date #3)

Doing more physical activity and/or increasing your effort? (date #5)

Don't worry if not. I have not really spoken about developing a daily practice yet (I avoided doing this on purpose) - we will get to that in a few days' time. This is just a friendly reminder! Your Cavebrain just loves repetition of the same message.

A word of caution. Your date may lead to romance, which may lead to a proposal, which may lead to a hen night. Beware!