Neutralise Your Guilt
Before We Begin - Calming Cavebrain
Everyone's cavebrains mean each person will be focused on how welcoming the group is to them...but we need to be more clever than our Cavebrains. We all need to welcome everybody else.
In turn each person says their name, where they are from and 1 television show/film/book/podcast they have enjoyed recently.
The next person responds to the previous person by saying "Welcome" + name commenting positively on either where they are from or the show/book/podcast.
If you cannot think of anything to say about what the previous person has said, just comment "That sounds really interesting" then say your bit.
Discussion - What are your issues with food at the moment?
#3 The Metronome
I see chaotic eating (what you have up to this point called binge eating) or compulsive eating as a metronome:
You believe that chaotic eating is the expression of your awfulness. I believe it is your Inner Food Rebel trying to stand up for you. Like a teenager who is fed up with being bullied at school, she doesn’t call Childline, but instead starts a fire at school - because nobody ever told her there was a better way:
How does this land for you?
Can you see your last chaotic episode (binge) as an act of rebellion?
Another way to see the IFR (Inner Food Rebel) is an energy within you that is trying to manage uncomfortable feelings, like rage, loneliness, discomfort, loss etc.
Discussion: Think about your last chaotic eating episode. What was the trigger (just describe your feelings if you do not want to share the details). How could you channel and release those feelings without using food next time?
Ideas from the group:
Primitive Getaway - 1 or 2 min burst of aggressive activity (run up and down on the spot or across a space, or even bouncing a ball fast)
Graffitti writing (scrawl your worst obscenities on a piece of paper with a big marker pen, then rip up, burn it etc)
We want to replace this image of the metronome with a test tube, which symbolises the spirit of experimentation, asking better questions and a neutral scientific approach.
This 'test tube' experimental approach is by far the best way I have found to neutralise the guilt and shame that does not belong to you. It is inappropriate.
Day One Action Steps
This reframe of your chaotic eating from the metronome to the test tube is so liberating (I hope you feel it!) that you may need to just process it for a while. Here are some optional journalling activities that you might like to do.
#1 If the metronome were a prison and you have just been released, what stories and lies do you no longer have to tell yourself now you are free?
#2 What has the diet-inner food rebel cycle stopped you doing in life that you now want to reclaim?
#3 Journal your ideas on any of the questions in the Test Tube graphic.
#4 What is the single most important action you can take as a result of this lesson?