Accept and Allow Practises

an Inner Shift

This is the second part on Accepting and Allowing

To recap, because it's soooooo important....

ACCEPTING means tolerating anything that is disappointing, uncomfortable or even painful


ALLOWING means giving yourself permission to have or be something empowering or helpful to you

Accept and Allow As a Daily Practice

There is no point understanding and agreeing with the Accept and Allow approach to life if you don’t actively make it part of your thinking.

I’d love to do a charity bike ride across Africa one day – but I do absolutely nothing to help make this a reality. That is OK for me, because other things are more important to me.

Accept and Allow can change your life – or it can be a nice idea that is relegated to African bike ride status – mere fantasy and a complete waste of time learning.

To actually use Accept and Allow to make your life easier and more meaningful, it needs to become a daily practice.

This is my daily A&A practice:

#1 Create Accept and Allow affirmations that are relevant to you personally

UPDATE: Allowing is better than allow

If you say I am accepting/ allowing myself to it is more of an active, do it now kind of instruction to the subconscious than merely I accept/allow, in the same way that I am revising hard every day for my exam shows more energy/effort than I revise every day.

Here are some examples ( I have left the word accept unchanged in a couple of places. Which version works better for you? There are no hard and fast rules here):

I am accepting my faults and am allowing myself to be as strong fit, and resilient as possible

I am accepting my imperfect body, and allowing myself to go to the gym today for an hour

I accept my mistakes at work last week, and am allowing myself to finish today’s report by 3.30pm

I accept that giving up sugar is uncomfortable, and am allowing myself to get used to the replacements.

I am allowing myself time on Wednesday at 6pm to create my menu board

I am allowing myself to take 20 minutes to eat breakfast this morning at 7.30am

I am allowing myself to have a relationship

I am allowing myself to risk rejection by asking ….

I am allowing myself to keep my house tidy so I feel relaxed when I come home.

NB Play around with these. You can see that some statements have accepting elements, and some are purely allowing. At the time of writing, I have only recently conceptualised the whole A&A affirmations, so I am still experimenting. One question I am always asking is “Does the accepting statement actually promote resistance?” Do ask yourself this. In the case of

I accept my mistakes at work last week

they have already happened, and with

I accept that giving up sugar is uncomfortable

I only advise using this if that is something you feel hard done by about, and a real victim. If it is already a big problem. As time goes on and you start to get used to not having sugar, I would absolutely get rid of that statement.

We will create and discuss the right A&A affirmations for you in sessions.


#2 Create your daily practice

For me this is:

#1 Put the theta audio on very low using headphones or earbuds.

#2 Three 4-7 breaths

#3 Think of at least three things I am grateful for

#4 State my A&A affirmations out loud, with a deep breath in between. If I feel some resistance to any, I say it three times with a deep breath between each restating.

#5 Now without the theta audio, meditate. If it is a new habit, start with 3 minutes and build up.

More on meditation here


One last thought: you might need to create an allowing affirmation to make doing these practises easier...if the irony of that has not made you fall off your chair!